Hey My Beautiful Baby. I do not know specifically what you are going through but You aint alone in that darkness. Sit for a moment with your broken Heart.
You will Notice when you Acknowledge, "My Heart hurts in the present moment." That your Pain is One with you and you are now being shifted into that present space of feeling at ONE.
You Pain is one with you and is absorbed 100 in that moment and you will lay there and feel more at ease keep repeating to yourself meditating on the heart ache "My Heart hurts in this present moment" And you will notice your heart pain start to ease as you lay there Present at present with your pain.
Where as Ignoring the Pain causes Resistance which causes PAIN.
Resistance is the root of all that pain. Resistance is the root of the die-hard fuck my life heart ache pain. And what you resist PERSISTS.
That is why it is so vital to repeat this affirmation to yourself as well as say it, proclaim it out loud, accept it, face it and feel it. FEEL & HEAL TO HEAL WHATS REAL. Don't try fuck it out Don't try shoot it up out, Don't try watch YOUTUBE to escape, Porn to escape the pain, other human beings, alcohol. DO NOT ESCAPE.
Acknowledge your Feelings 100 and repeat that affirmation alone in your bedroom on your bed. Be present with yourself and the pain and you will notice the shift energetically within yourself. The pain will not be as mf chaotic and deathly but more natural and flowing.
You need to let the grief and loss flow Naturally thru you so it can leave the vessel 100. You have to feel and affirm this pain, acknowledge it and let it run its due course. This is a pinnacle time in your soul growth journey and it requires alot of Isolation and me time. Please, love yourself to lay with it and feel it and Baby yourself so much at this time.
I love you so Much. Spoil yourself like you would someone you love the most in the World my dearly beloved.
I love you.